3 Ways to Keep Him Interested

Posted on by Kisses

3 Ways to Keep Him Interested

Sometimes after being in a relationship for a long time things can get repetitive and monoutous. And sometimes men lose interest. Here are some things that you can do to keep him interested or keep the relationship alive.

1) Surprise him. Guys love when you change it up. Unpredictability is sexy. For example: Create a romantic setting/sexy occasion, cook him dinner one day, send him a sexy gift, write him a song, and do it all just because- this will keep definitely keep him interested, guys like mystery, but not too much.

2) Give him time to miss you. Now I am not an advocate for games in which you wait 2/3 days to call, but I think it is always nice to spend time doing stuff with your friends and for yourself and then coming back to your significant other. Distance definitely makes the heart goes fonder.

3) Take him out somewhere different that you haven’t gone too, or some place that you don’t normally go. For example: a broadway play, a live show, a concert, laser tag, beach, picnic, fireworks, exotic cuisine. Or even surprise him with two tickets to his favorite basketball team’s game etc – he will love that you care enough about his interests and not just your own

3 Ways to Keep Her Interested

Posted on by Kisses

3 Ways to Keep Her Interested

Sometimes after being in a relationship for a long time things can get repetitive and monoutous. And sometimes women lose interest. Here are some things that you can do to keep her interested or keep the relationship alive.

  1. Surprise her. I cannot stress this enough, women love surprises and even if they say they don’t they do. But it has to be a well thought out surprise. For example: cook her dinner one day, send flowers to her job, write her a song, and do it all just because- this will keep definitely keep her interested, in fact she might be smitten

  2. Give her time to miss you. Now I am not an advocate for games in which you wait 2/3 days to call, but I think it is always nice to spend time doing stuff with your friends and for yourself and then coming back to your significant other. Distance definitely makes the heart goes fonder.

  3. Take her out somewhere different that you haven’t gone too, or some place that you don’t normally go. For example: a broadway play, a live show, a concert, laser tag, beach, picnic, fireworks, exotic cuisine

Make Time or End it

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Make Time or End it….

One thing I cannot stand are excuses. When it comes to a relationship there is no such thing as too busy and anyone who tells you different is lying. I was able to maintain a relationship while being a double major in college, a resident assistant, in a choir, and in other school activies at the same exact time. I always make time for those who are important to me and if your significant other is not making time for you or making efforts to do so it is time to end your relationship. I have seen people within long distance relationships make time for someone they love who aren’t even around so there is no excuse for making the time. A relationship is all about compromise and circumstance and if you cannot do either one even if you work crazy hours or have many obligations then you do not belong in a relationship. If when it comes to your relationship you have to think hard about squeezing in 30 minutes just to hear your significant other’s voice then your relationship is doomed and you should really prioritize your schedule or walk away. It is as simple as that. Make time or End it because no one wants to come 3rd or 4th place in your list of priorities and if you value what you have with someone you will work hard to maintain it. One song that comes to mind when I think of making time in a relationship is the classic 702 song entitled, “Make Time.” I love this song and you should definetely check it out. Please send me your opinions and your feedback. Have you ever been in relationship in which you just didnt have the time or your significant other just wouldnt make time for you? How did that make you feel and did you do anything to resolve the issue. I would love to here from you and Thanks for reading.

-Kisses

“TO DTR OR TO NOT DTR?”

Posted on by Kisses

For those of you reading this wondering what the hell am I talking about, let me first define the acronym DTR. DTR stands for………: define the relationship. For those of you that watch “Awkward” on MTV (an awesome show) you already knew that but for those of you that haven’t seen the show, I think you should watch it lol. But anywho that is not what this article is about. I want talk about when you should define a relationship and when you shouldn’t. A lot of people say, “I hate labels and why complicate things”, but I think you complicate things when you don’t even know what things are. And the moment you start having guidelines and rules for what is and isn’t okay you are already defining what it is you are doing within itself, so why not DTR? I’ll tell you why, if the person you are “talking” to isn’t treating you right then chances are in a relationship they won’t treat you much better. I mean of course if you aren’t someone’s official significant other you might not experience the full benefits of girlfriend or boyfriend status but you should have an idea of what’s to come. Honestly, in the words of Maya Angelou, “if a person shows you who they are, believe them.” If someone lies to you in the beginning, that’s a bad sign. I believe in second chances but I also believe in honesty. Relationships require just that, honesty and if you don’t start on a strong foundation how on earth will you last? You won’t, simple as that. And a small lie can become a big lie, and a small lie makes me think, “why did he feel he had to lie about that”. In fact it makes me feel like that person doesn’t trust me, and you absolutely cannot have a relationship without trust. So my point is at this point is if you and your current interest are not fully honest with each other and do not fully trust each other do not DTF, or for better words do not get into a relationship. In fact walk away if it’s been awhile and you are still unsure. Love is a lot of things, but one thing it is definitely not, is unsure. Which leads to my next point, are you comfortable with each other? And this is after being comfortable fully with yourself. Do you guys feel comfortable enough around each other to just open up, and be yourselves? If the answer is no, or I am not there yet, you are probably not ready to DTR. Also be true to yourself, if what you are involved in is a fling then make sure both parties are aware of that, so no one gets hurt. The worst thing is to think your in a serious relationship with someone and then to find out that in fact they are seeing other people and not claiming you. If anything you should probably always define the nature of your relationship. But when it comes to actually officially deciding on when you should be in a relationship that’s when you have to take into account a lot of different things such as;

honesty, trust, openness, level of comfort, are you a secret? Are you just in it for the physical? All of these things play an important role in DTR’ing lol. Thanks for reading guys

Kisses

Going the distance

Posted on by Kisses

Going the distance:

There is no doubt about it that long distance relationships are no easy feat. In fact they take a lot of energy and effort so it’s only natural to feel apprehensive about choosing to “go the distance.” I have to admit after having being in a few long distance relationships I had deemed them not for me and had conformed to a “JUST SAY NO” policy, but after research and talking to a few people currently in long distance relationships I have pulled a 360 and have changed my mind. If you are considering starting a long distance relationship with someone I think it is important to know what you and your interest long term and short term goals. This is extremely important. Here are some pros and cons when considering a long distance relationship:

Pros:

-You get to know a person on a more personal level without relying heavily on physical interaction. In fact circumstance causes you to really dig deep and know a person’s true character which actually takes longer when you are in close proximity. When you are constantly videoing chatting or on the phone with a person it forces you to open up eventually and know all those things that really matter within a relationship

  • You can maintain your own individuality and use your time to be very productive.

  • It forces you to incorporate unique ways to express how you feel since you are not always together

  • It requires a lot of determination and devotion so it can create a very solid foundation and you can insure that the person you are with is really into you.

  • After long periods without seeing your significant other it will feel like heaven on earth and you will really cherish the times that you share together

  • You become very comfortable with a person without having to deal with physical tempations that can really interfere with truly knowing if you are compatible with a person for who they are and not just what they look like.

  • You have to develop a huge level of trust because you are not in the same area and without it, it can cause a huge strain.

Cons:

  • It really sucks not seeing the person you care about for long periods of time. Sometimes you want more than a phone call or video chat, which is very normal.

  • It takes a lot of time and energy but so does any relationship

  • Depending on your visiting schedules and locations it can be costly, so make sure the person you choose is worth it

  • You can feel lonely at times

I am currently in a long distance relationship and while it is hard not seeing my boyfriend for long periods of time, I have never been happier and the times we do share together mean that much more. I feel I know him very well and that I am getting to know him on a much deeper level than I ever was with any of my other local relationships which as helped us grow a very deep bond and helps us to grow together everyday. I felt my boyfriend was worth it so I decided to go the distance, make sure to really weight the pros and cons before you do so. While long distance relationships are not for everyone it can lead to a very wonderful relationship in which you and your partner are in the same location one day. Thanks for reading. Please send me your long distance relationship stories, I would love to hear about them.

Kisses

Plentyoffish.com Review

Posted on by Kisses

Plentyoffish.com Review

Out of all the dating sites that I have reviewed this site is my least favorite. While this site has the most users ranging in 30 million this leaves room for a lot of creepers and fake profiles. While I am not a huge fan of this site if you live in an area that is not that popular and other sites dont provide you with enough matches to choose from I would recommend plentyoffish because there are so many member profiles. On this site there is no matching questions and no daily matches. There are no questions or indepth matching system that would allow you to see any compatibility capabilities. This site does have instant messenging and you can turn it off at anytime. Beware of fake profiles as there are many on this site. Also due to the high volume of profiles there are many profiles that are inactive with members who have not signed in in over a year time span. Also I have realized that on the quality of matches on this site is not as high as other sites because there are more people on here looking for a quick hook up. If you are not looking for a long term commitment then this site is probably a better option because people can list if they want something, long term, or short term. This allows you to know exactly what members are looking for so that you can be on the same page, which is kind of nice. At times it is hard to tell if you and someone else is on the same page so this feature gives you that information.

Pros:

-Over 30 million users

-Instant messenger feature

-Phone app

Cons:

-No matching system

  • Many fake profiles/creepers

  • many inactive profiles

  • very basic website

Match.com Review

Posted on by Kisses

Match.com Review

I have to say that while on match I made some observations regarding dating and racial preference. Before I address this I will give an honest review of the site itself. Overall I like match.com. One feature that I really like that I havent seen on the other sites I tried was something called “stir events.” Stir events are events where singles in your area can attend and they are exclusive for paying members. Sometimes the events do get sold out quickly because they are quite appealing. For example I came across two events, one being rock climbing and the other being a mixer at a bar. I think this is a great feature because it encourages safe meeting places and actually gives members great dating ideas that are already set up. Some can be a little pricey but some events are actually reasonably priced, so for that I give match.com a thumbs up. On match.com you can have a free membership but it does not allow you to communicate with other members you will just get notifications that someone has written to you or that someone may be interested, so a paid subscription is recommended. Match.com is $35 a month, $59.97 for 3 months (20 per month) and $101.94 for 6 months ($16.99 per month). This isn’t too bad especially if you decide to do a longer subscription. At first the thought of paying for a dating site was absurd to me but then I realized that the quality was actually better on some paid sites. When you think about it, it makes sense; someone who is very serious about finding someone will be more willing to pay a fee to do so and so there is a higher chance you will find someone who is just as serious as you are and not just looking for a simple hook up. Match sends you daily matches everyday of which they share certain profile similarities with you. I think that this is kind of cool because then the chances are higher that you will see someone you favor. One feature that Match does not have is an instant messenger feature. While this is true they do have a matchphone feature which allows you to accept call requests, text and call. While I really do like match’s features, as an African-American woman I felt this site was not the best choice. This has more to do with its members. I found that while browsing a lot of men listed their racial preference and almost none of the men, including Black men did not have black women listed as a preference. I found it harder to get replies and messages because of this and I did not like that. While this is not the site’s fault there are a lot of men on this site that do not prefer women of color so for African-American women I would suggest a different site. While reading online I noticed that on many sites black women have less of a chance of being notified than other women which is probably due to the negative stereotypes that bombard society, but even so it upset me. Overall I would recommend match.com but not for African-American women based on my own experience, but everyone’s experience may be different.

Pros:

-Stir events (love love love this feature)

-matchphone

-daily matches

  • has a match.com phone app

  • lets you send winks, and favorite profiles

  • lets you see who is viewing your profile

  • provides a good amount of matches

Cons:

-no instant messenger feature

  • events can be a little pricey

Plentyoffish.com Review

Out of all the dating sites that I have reviewed this site is my least favorite. While this site has the most users ranging in 30 million this leaves room for a lot of creepers and fake profiles. While I am not a huge fan of this site if you live in an area that is not that popular and other sites dont provide you with enough matches to choose from I would recommend plentyoffish because there are so many member profiles. On this site there is no matching questions and no daily matches. There are no questions or indepth matching system that would allow you to see any compatibility capabilities. This site does have instant messenging and you can turn it off at anytime. Beware of fake profiles as there are many on this site. Also due to the high volume of profiles there are many profiles that are inactive with members who have not signed in in over a year time span. Also I have realized that on the quality of matches on this site is not as high as other sites because there are more people on here looking for a quick hook up. If you are not looking for a long term commitment then this site is probably a better option because people can list if they want something, long term, or short term. This allows you to know exactly what members are looking for so that you can be on the same page, which is kind of nice. At times it is hard to tell if you and someone else is on the same page so this feature gives you that information.

Pros:

-Over 30 million users

-Instant messenger feature

-Phone app

Cons:

-No matching system

  • Many fake profiles/creepers

  • many inactive profiles

  • very basic website

BlackPeopleMeet Review

Posted on by Kisses

BlackPeopleMeet.com Review:

If you are looking for a site that is more specific then I would suggest BlackPeopleMeet. I personally do not have a racial preference when it comes to dating but I wanted to try this site out and see what it was about. I did notice that on this website there were people of different cultural backgrounds all throughout. While this website does have a fee it is on the cheaper side when it comes to paid dating sites. You can have a free membership but you will only be able to send flirts and no messages or any other forms of communication, so a paid subscription is recommended. I paid $13.00 for one month and I believe for a 3 month subscription it was about $43.00 which is not that bad compared to other paid sites. Economically this is a good choice if you are trying to meet other African-American singles in your area. One thing I will say is be careful when choosing what kind of subscription you want. I clicked a one month subscription and somehow received three months. Since I knew I wanted to review this site for you guys I decided just to keep it and not contact them, but this is just an fyi. I am going to list below Pros and Cons for this website:

Pros:

-There are a lot of different matches to choose from

-You can send flirts

-There is a live chat feature
– There are daily matches

-They include dating tips and success stories

Cons:

-There are some creepers and sometimes I got messages that were clearly copy and pasted several times

  • You cannot really search based on personal interest so you have to really get to know a person first or read their page in order to see compatibility

  • There is no match system that uses actual interest and moral beliefs etc

  • There is no phone app so it is very hard to use on your phone

  • Does not allow you to search based on sexual orientation- so not a good site for those who aren’t straight

Overall I would recommend this site, but if you are looking for a more thorough match system this site has not developed one yet. It is a good site to meet a lot of people.

Okcupid Review

Posted on by Kisses

If you are looking for a dating site that isn’t costly, okcupid is a good choice. Okcupid is a free dating site that I have personally used a few times. One thing that I really like about this dating site in particular are the questions that they use to tell you your match potential with others. The questions on this site are actually very detailed questions that would indeed give you an idea if you and someone else have the same morals and if you will be compatible or not. The only discrepency with that is, not all members take the time out to answer these questions and so it can be deemed irrelevant in some cases. Okcupid also allows you to fix your email preferences or block members so that you can filter out unwanted messages. I also feel that Okcupid has a very detailed search option. You can search for people based on education, interests, location, drinking habits and more, which allows you to narrow down your search instead of wasting your time. When I was on this site I filtered out a lot of people because there are some things that are just dealbreakers for me and I liked having that option. And ofcourse with any dating site there are always creepers that will write you continously and write you rude messages. This happened to me a few times but not often and I was able to block those members and report them as well. I felt the number of matches in my area was significant enough that I would have enough matches to choose from. While on Okcupid I met a few guys some of which were really nice, but I did not click with some. I actually met a really nice and handsome guy on there, but in the end we both were in different places in life and we agreed to just remain friends. Overall I would recommend this site to someone who does not want to pay for a dating site and who wants to be able to narrow down their search and see match capability. To check out okcupid click here www.okcupid.com

Here is my list of pros and cons:

Pros:

-Matching Questions that provide match capability

-Security Preferences

-Good search navigation that let’s you narrow down your search in categories

-Has instant messaging that you can disable if you choose

-The phone app is pretty legit

-They send you daily matches

-You can see who is available in your local area

-Lets you search based on sexual orientation

Cons:

-Creepers/Fakes

-Sometimes there are not enough matches in your area that meet your dating criteria

-Not every person answers the match questions so it may not be very accurate

-the daily matches are usually unfavorable in my opinion and seem a bit random

10 Ways To Make Your Dating Profile Stand Out From The Rest

Posted on by Kisses

  1. Have a main picture that shows you in your happiest state. People love to be around happy people, and I know the profiles that appealed to me when I tried online dating were profiles that had a guy smiling or looking very happy.

  2. Have atleast 5 clear pictures that show you from different angles. Also put up pictures that really reflect who you are. If you wouldnt normally meet someone and stick your boobs out in hopes of attracting them don’t put up a picture that shows all your goodies. I guarantee you will attract all the wrong people.

  3. Do not lists all the things you are not looking for. It makes you look picky and like you are looking for perfection even if that is not your true intention. Focus on the positive. I am not saying to never disclose this information I just think that while getting to know somene you will find out if they have all the qualities you want.

  4. Be honest and not too vague

  5. Do not write more than 3 or 4 paragraphs about yourself. It will become to wordy and like you are trying to sum up your whole life story on a page, and if you are pretty awesome it would be impossible to do so. Give others an idea of what you are into and what your personality is like but don’t give them everything. Everyone loves a little mystery. I personally won’t read a whole page once it starts turning into a novel.

  6. Do not include pictures with you and other people. It will take away the focus of you and it is not facebook, it is a dating site.

  7. Have a good tagline and description that is different from other profiles. Usually profiles that interested me the most were different from the norm. With that being said do not write a profile full of jokes and nothing of substance. If I think your taking this for a joke I won’t take your seriously.

  8. Use recent pictures.

  9. Do not say anything that will make you come off as deserperate. If I read a page that says, “I really need a girlfriend” that makes me think “RED FLAG- HIGHLY INSECURE-AND CLINGLY PERSON ON BOARD- STAY AWAY”

  10. Stay away from TMI- do not reveal unnecessary information. It is okay to reveal some of your flaws while getting to know someone but do not make a list of them and post them on your page. That is heavy information that could scare away someone who doesn’t even know your name. Take it easy!!!

Thanks For Reading

-Kisses