Recently I got a message from a friend asking me if she should continue seeing a guy that she wasn’t physically connected to or if she should end it. I personally think that it is very important that you are attracted to a person BODY, MIND, AND SOUL. I think that you cannot have one without the other because they all correlate. The same goes for the other way around, if you think someone is gorgeous but you have no chemistry, there is no point, unless you simply want a physical relationship. I told her that if he doesn’t make your vagina whisper then please move on. And that goes for both males and females in any type of relationship that involves another person. If you don’t feel excited or get that spark after feeling them out you should move on. I am in no way a shallow person but I think that if you do not have a physical attraction as well as chemistry with someone that the relationship won’t go far and will fade out.
When you like someone and you are feeling them, you usually just know. The fact that my friend wrote me a message due to her uncertainty shows that she already had doubts after only a few dates. I think that is way too soon to question if you want to even go on another date with someone which means she really just wasn’t feeling it. I think it’s better to be honest with yourself and move on before that other person gets in too deep. You don’t want to cause any heartbreak because you decided well I guess I will give him/her another shot even though he/she doesn’t make my heart smile. At the same time some people have ridiculous standards. If you think that every person you meet is going to look like a super model then you need a serious reality check. I think it is just important that you have an attraction to a person, they do not need to be the best looking person in the world. In fact there will probably always be someone else out there that you will be attracted to, a lot of fishes in the sea. But once you have that initial attraction you have something to begin with and then if you get to know someone and they have a wonderful personality it will complement them nicely and they will probably become even more attractive in your eyes.
I personally just do not feel that it is wise to pursue something with someone you have no initial attraction for. I have seen some cases in which this has worked out but I have also seen many situations in which that didn’t happen and someone ended up getting hurt. I know that not every guy is going to find me attractive and vice versa, but that’s life. We all like different things. Someone else will see what someone else doesn’t and then you can build on that by creating a deeper connection that connects you mind and soul. I want to feel butterflies when I see someone (which i have) and I want to want their embrace. If I am simply not attracted to you I will not see you past a certain level. Why do you think they say that the first impression is so important? Because people go by sight first and then the rest follows. But I also think that if you meet someone who you have chemistry with but aren’t physically attracted to, you should give them a chance. Attraction is not only skin deep, but if after a few dates you still aren’t fully feeling it, walk away.
Vagina whisperers… haha.
This is true. A physical attraction is often necessary to be in a bf/gf relationship. But sometimes that physical attraction overrides any other attraction or lack thereof and that is when it becomes dangerous. It is important to recognize the exact reasons why you want to be with this person, and make sure it isn't because he or she is sexy.
I definitely agree- because then it becomes a very materialistic/shallow relationship that probably only touches the surface and never gets deep—-that gets boring
your cute….”now what”
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